The Messe had a lot of the same plug-ins/MIDI here/softsynth there. How can you explore new music if you don’t have a sexual relationship to your instrument? The big companies shouldn’t only build “compact cars” for the masses — we need more people who design musical instruments instead of tools. If a tool gets old, eBay and goodbye.

Here are things that aren’t just tools.

The Manikin Electronic Memotron is a freaky hardware (!) Melotron clone with digital samples of the original Melotron tapes. You have to be completely insane to build a hardware clone of this old cult tape sample — and that’s so cool.

It’s not new, but Messe had the most evolved version yet of Dave Smith’s Poly Evolver keyboard. It’s the synth of the year, no question. That beautifully crafted blue screaming monster creates an incredibly huge bandwidth of sounds: Warm phat analog, thin sharp digital, wonderful unheard noises, scary effects . . . it’s not just a retro synth, it makes sounds that will power the electronic music hits of 2006. This blue monster is bigger than Godzilla, cooler than Robocop, and sexier than Kylie, which is saying a lot.

The Vermona ReTubeVerb has a wonderful vintage (retro) look and sound. I love a desktop spring reverb unit with 3-band EQ and a real tube for that big analog vibe. Back to the 60s!

Schippmann’s Ebbe and Flut is a rack mount analog filter with envelopes, noise gate and LFOs. It’s perfect to twist around and “phunk up” sounds. The prototype is very solid, I was going wild torturing some knobs but the inventor had no fear that I could destroy his baby. Bravo for stuff that handles rough use on stage.

The Curetronic Modular System modules are handmade in Germany; they’re designed to survive rockin’ live acts or going wild on at your studio. Their web site lists all the modules, which are also available as DIY kits. You can get the front panels in a dozen different colors, or personalized — good for design freaks. A Frankfurt 2005 highlight.

It’s warm, it’s huuuuge, it’s little, it’s green: The MFB Fricke Filterbox is a wonderful analog sequenced desktop filter; the eight sequencer steps can be triggered by input trigger or MIDI clock. You can fatten softsynth strings with massive analog phasing, trash up your drumbox grooves, create weird psychedelic soundscapes, or turn your grandfather’s Farfisa organ into a deadly underground acid weapon — everything goes.

The Edirol cg-8 video synthesizer created some really cool projections. It has a sensor pad plus two D-beams, very promising for the next step in live video manipulation. But every visitor on the fair wanted to check out the machine at the same time, so when I tried to focus on this baby dozen of other little sticky stinky fingers were pushing buttons and changing menus, so I had two choices: Let my fists talk and cause a punchfest, or peacefully ask Edirol for a test unit to check out back home at Club Camouflage at our next acidparty! The acidparty option sounded like more fun.

If you worship at the Church of White Noise, the Macbeth m5 was the most impressive new analog synth. It’s handcrafted in Scotland by analog genius Ken Macbeth and generates wild electronic noises. It’s sorta like an ARP 2600, or at least inspired by that cult synth. It’s pricey so I have to sell my car and soul to finance it, but no sacrifice is too great.

I can’t resist a good MIDI controller, and now Doepfer has a ribbon one. How cool. An inner voice is forcing me to order it from their web shop . . . cannot fight urge . . .

Oh yes, and Jomox presented the xbase999. It’s a promising-looking beatdevil that’s based on the xbase09 and has 12 voices, but you can upload your own samples, like a modern TR909. For my studio and live shows it’s a must.

And here’s what I want next year: A rediscovery of the 1/4" mono patch cable. The software industry has spent millions trying to simulate that flexibility of this silly little cable but never succeeded. If we are talking about real analog equipment, the patch cord is the king of what makes something analog — it’s not just the sound. We need those “freedom wires” again!